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Once I was a Painter

February 11, 2012

Whenever I go to the house of my niece Even in Novaliches located in Jordan Plaines, I always check on the painting hanging in her living room. The painting reminds me that once upon a time I used to paint. I feel sad knowing that I can’t paint anymore. I lost whatever confidence I had before. But I feel consoled by admitting to myself that visual art is not my line; filmmaking is.

My painting depicting children at play. It is one of the few paintings left after our house burned in 1998. Luckily, it was not in our house.

I found joy in being a docu filmmaker, specifically an advocacy filmmaker. But before embarking into working on my own films, I used to think that being a film editor was “it.” I was happy as one until I started making my own film even though all of them are small budgeted projects. But I feel more complete, a total maker of a film — with complete control from its pre-production to post-production. Quite difficult but more challenging. Although my work with Tikoy also starts from pre-production stage still my involvement is limited. The main challenge as film editor comes during the editing stage itself when actual footages are brought from the field. The total indie filmmaker — as producer/director/editor, faces the bigger challenge that covers all aspects of production. I may have made simple, and small films but I know that they each hold a place as important part of social or cultural history because of the choice of my content and because of their pioneering nature. Above everything is the fact that I am happy with whatever I am doing. There is no producer to dictate and stress me by pressing on what they want.

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